lukegilman.com : The Blawgraphy
Life of a Law Student, University of Houston Law Center

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Please note: I'm no longer updating this particular blog, but keep it around for archival purposes. Visit me at the current blog at www.lukegilman.com

Ah Family… (a lawyer joke my dad sent me)

“Southern Grandma”

Lawyers should never ask a Southern grandma a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, “Mrs.. Jones, do you know me?”

She responded, “Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I’ve known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.”

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, “Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?”

She again replied, “Why, yes, I do. I’ve known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He’s lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can’t build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.” The defense attorney almost died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, “If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I’ll send you to the electric chair.”

From the same man who gave me Death of Common Sense: How Law is Suffocating America for Christmas last year. ;-)

I knew I liked this guy

Add another reason why – NY Times: In Law School, Obama Found Political Voice

Though I guess I don’t like him as much as this Timothy Noah does -
The Obama Messiah Watch: Introducing a periodic feature considering evidence that Obama is the son of God.

“Oh my god, they killed Posner!”

the-pos.jpg

Not really. However, our contract prof has an strange habit of allowing a few glaring factual errors to go forth into the intellectual ether uncontradicted from time to time. Last night, someone started waxing philosophical about Posner’s approach as being indicative of a bygone era and that ‘if Posner was still around today he likely would have taken a different view.’ Ouch. Just to set the record straight, not only does he live, he blogs. Long Live the Pos! Down with Asymmetrical Information!

Oddest Sentence I’ve Read Today

“First, aspirations that lesbians may have for a new and better way of creating relations may be stunted by reliance on a patriarchal contractual model, thus domesticating or colonizing lesbian relationship.” Testy, An Unlikely Resurrection, 90Nw. U.L. Rev 219, 220 (1995).

As if I didn’t already have enough weird ideas to digest about in contracts, now I get to worry that lesbians may have been trying to formulate an alternative to contract law but were once again co-opted by The Man.

Law Student Defames Self With Ridiculous Complaint

via WSJ law blog: Slow Typist Sues His Law School

Certain exams taken by [plaintiff] that required students to be skilled touch-typists in order to produce a competitive response resulted in borderline failing grades by virtue of the low volume of prose [plaintiff] could type in the time allotted as compared with other students.

Oh and he also sued a firm that fired him from a summer associateship for defamation and violation of due process rights. Can’t imagine why they did that.

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